Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Pain! or What If

Pain is a debilitating experience. Depending on the magnitude of the pain it can lay you up. I have spent the last couple of days either trying to work through the pain (in this case physical pain) or not able to do anything at all.
You know what is most unfortunate about it? It could have been avoided. So much of the things we go through in life could have been avoided, if only....
I look back on my years of toil in the 'art world' and realise the opportunities I let slip through my fingers because of fear. Fear of failure, fear of rejection, fear of... anything. When I finally stepped off the ledge I recognised the one thing I missed the whole time, that I should not have; God was there and He would not have let me fall.
Now, I look back at all the what ifs and realise that like the pain, they could have been avoided. I can do without all the 'what ifs'. I am not going to look for all the monsters under the bed and talk myself out of opportunities. I am going to step out. I can't avoid the pain i'm experiencing now unless I take the steps necessary to fix the problem that started it. Looking back and saying what if is going to help neither the pain nor my art. Stepping out will.

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